How to End Your Comic Strip
There it is. I predicted that it would take around six years to rerun them all, and I was right. This is nothing short of a triumph for my ability to perform basic math.
You still have my gratitude.
So, now that I’ve rerun them all with comments, what will I do with the comic strip now? The answer is, “Something.”
Will I post them all again, this time without commentaries? Maybe with different commentaries? Or maybe I’ll write new commentaries commenting on the old commentaries?
Or, will I do . . . something else?
Please keep checking the site and see!
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How to Embrace Progress
It is an interesting paradox. You create a product that’s sole reason for existing is to take up space in packages, then you must ship it all over the world from your factory. Logically, there must be trucks, boxcars, and shipping containers traveling all over the world, transporting nothing but brand-new packing peanuts and rolls of bubble wrap.
That must be a fairly low-stress run for a trucker. No need to worry about the shipment getting damaged, and the fuel costs have to be lower than usual. It also would be a real kick in the pants for any hijacker who steals the shipment looking for stuff they can sell.
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How to Understand Generalizations
I grew up in a small town. I remember being told many times that the city was full of crime and violence. I also remember our house being burgled, and that the guy who ran the tiny little store at a crossroads out amongst the farms nearly died when a robber hit him repeatedly in the face with a large can of V-8.
From that day forward, I was just as fearful of crime in the country as I was in the city. Also, I never developed a taste for V-8.
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How to Vent Your Frustration
Another Mission Impossible movie came out between the one mentioned in this comic and now. Mission: Impossible Fallout. In it, Tom Cruise and his team had to operate as fugitives, and he dangled from the underside of an elevator.
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How to Make Peace
Way back in the mists of time, I participated in more than one roast. I was always surprised how few of the comedians ever bothered to actually write new material specifically about the person being roasted. Most of them seemed to just go up and do their usual act with some half-hearted segue to make it seem like the bit you’d seen them do a million times was somehow about the person being honored.
I thought about that while I was watching a documentary about the comedian Bob Einstein (A.K.A. Super Dave Osborne). He is the brother of Albert Brooks. Their father was a well-known comedian way back in the day. Bob Einstein swore he would never go into comedy after attending his father’s funeral, because Milton Berle got up, and instead of actually saying anything about the deceased, just did his act.
I wish I found that hard to believe.
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How to React to a Friend's Good News
When we were comedians, the real Ric used to be described, in his introduction, as “a psychotic ball of stress.” Now he works in a job where he is appreciated for his level head and steady hand on the tiller.
Not well appreciated, but at least somewhat appreciated.
His company gives the employees little mementos and awards to commemorate various milestones working for the company. I think it was the ten-year mark when Ric came into his office to find a small cardboard box on his chair. He opened it to find a nice metal keychain of the company logo in a presentation box, and a folded piece of paper. It turned out to be instructions for his supervisor for how to present the gift to Ric, including the specific directive: “Tell the employee how important they are, to you and to the team.”
And in a way, they did exactly that.
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